Pershore Golf Society

 

 

 

 

 

​​NEV GREEN PLATE 2025

KINGTON

 

 

As everyone knows Kington is the highest course in England at 1284 feet, and the furthest we tend to travel for a single event, made even further if you travel with Jerry.

 

No SatNav (he knows the route well, using pubs and garden centres as way marks) we got lost and ended up on some farm tracks (pretty much like Sumo leaving the course) However, we made it in time for bacon and vice Meady’s brief.

 

An elite 23 had signed up, with most of our younger contingent not allowed out, Gaz and Sam being the exceptions. Sam’s name was already penciled in the fine book, when he strolled in 90 seconds from deadline.

 

There were some interesting choices of attire on display. Nev and me (or is that I) going retro with past captain’s shirts. Maz having borrowed one of Val Donnegan’s sweaters, Dave A in his normal swim wear with McD and Jerry looking like they were playing at Wimbledon.

 

The 1st is a tricky uphill par-4, made even tricker with the dry conditions, which meant you had to start it way right to stand any chance of staying on the fairway, a feat some managed but many not.

 

Bish hit his first one straight and watched as it disappeared into the rubbish, his provo not fairing much better. When he got to the quarry on the left, he found an old guy in there picking up balls, which probably included his.

 

Eventually the first group of Bish, Tel and Dave A cleared the fairway, allowing me, Doddy, Clive B and Nev to get going and we hardly saw them again until we got back to the clubhouse.

 

The ferns and gorse were on steroids, and it was a lottery finding the right ball (there were plenty in there) and if you strayed it was best to take stroke & distance, rather than try and hack it out.

 

We have played Kington several times, but we could not remember more benign conditions with not a breath, for most of the way round. Sheep and their crap were in abundance and Doddy pulled while taking a leak just off one of the tees and aroused interest from a mother and daughter!

 

It was Clive’s first time there and was having a tough time keeping the ball on the fairway early on, but he got it back together just as my game went South.

 

Having played the front OK, I started the back birdie/bogey/par. On 13 I hit one straight down the middle, to plaudits from my partners, never to be seen again! This resulted in an 8 followed by a 9, with the crowning turd, playing Nev’s ball on 17.

 

Meanwhile Doddy had decided to perform trick shots, playing a ball stuck up a gorse bush, as photographic evidence will show.

 

It was about this time that we came under fire from Sam. On 13 his drive landed just by me and rolled 50 yards down the fairway, then on 14 he hit one through us as we were putting out. “It was only a 7-iron” was his only defense, like that made it better. Result was the same. FINE.

 

The entertainment ramped up on 18 which was nearest the pin in two and is drivable par-4. Clive hit one which according to Tel, Bish and Dave (who had been in for some time) nearly went in and ended up 6-feet away. He then holed out to secure the prize as no one else managed it.

 

Balls were despatched to various parts of the course, some just missing the clubhouse, some on the green or just off, which included McD up the bank at the back and making a cock of it for a 5, so no one threatened Clive until the last group.

 

The last group of Moody, Ciric, Weaver & Hibbert, eventually appeared on the 18th tee having lost several holes and Jerry entertained us by 3 putting from just off the green when he had a chance of sharing the prize with Clive.

 

After the sheep crap had settled the results were.

 

• NP – JRGW

• NP2 – Clive B.

• 3rd – Dave A – 71.

• 2nd – Mark W. – 69

• 1st – Maz – 65.

 

Gaz won the Chimp for a resounding 89, narrowly beating Aye, who needed a lay down having got sea sickness from driving his buggy.

 

Great knocks by Maz and Mark which will reflect in their new handicaps and well-done Terry for taking over from Robbo, who is doing his part to support the wine industry in Oz and keeping up his tradition of forgetting the NP markers.

 

Next event is the Mafia match, when the Chimp will be up for grabs again.

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