Pershore Golf Society
Summer Special
Lilley Brook Golf Club
August 2024
Lilley Brook formally known as Cheltenham GC was re-named after the “Lilley brook” which runs through the course and is a tributary of the well known River Chelt.
Originally designed in 1921 by Dr Alistair MacKenzie, of Augusta and The Worcestershire fame, the course still has 9 of the original MacKenzie greens, strangely, as does The Worcestershire.
We all rocked up for the Summer Special on what turned out to be a pleasant and sunny, if breezy, day. Fortunately, the ironically named Storm Lillian had passed through in the night and taken its 60 mph winds and heavy rain with it, long before we were due to tee off.
Everyone gathered together in the well appointed clubhouse for the usual bacon roll and “Captain’s Brief”. Unfortunatey, we were lacking both Captain Robbo himself and the inevitable “Notsotimely” Peter Jolley, who unfortunately for him, fell foul of a new and unknown rule that demotes anyone being late for the Captain’s Undies into the last group out.
The fine figure standing in for the fine figure of Robbo was Mr Ian Brazier, who performed well despite some heckling, a lot actually! And he could have faced a fine for hesitation had he been on that famous BBC radio programme “Just a Minute”. But we all left the brief “Brief” well briefed and fully informed on everything except how to play good golf.
Stepping out onto the first tee in the 5th group, I too suffered some heckling with cries of “you’re late Jolley, just like your brother” and “shall we play through” from the 6th rowdy crowd. Our fine 4 ball of Chris Rawlings, Robin Proctor, Moggie and me was soon up behind the group ahead containing the famous Russian spy Kim Philby, ex Wham singer George Michael and well known speedster “Bluebird” Malcolm Campbell.
After 11 fair and interesting but tree-lined holes, and the strange “Half-Way House” which was full of vending machines in which Chris R spent several long minutes and then reappeared with a Kit Kat and 3 condoms, things took a turn for the worse on the very doglegged 12th, where Robin hit to the wrong green, Chris R had several goes at chipping up the stupidly steep bank to the green only to find the ball running 20 yds back to his feet. Thereafter the final 6 holes were “different” to say the least, taking great physical and mental toll on many players I believe. With the cry “I’m never coming here again” ringing out over the fairways!
On the awkward 14th hole that you’ll all no doubt remember (over the pole on top of the heart attack hill), Robin P decided to let his trolley run down a bank, only for it to get a mind of its own and accellerate off downhill gathering enough speed to excite even Malcolm Campbell, ski-jump a tee, spectacularly jumping 5 feet into the air, zoom down the steep slope, veer left along the path for 20 yds then dive gaily like Tom Daley off the 10m board, head first into the waist high brambles. When Robin eventually arrived on the 15th tee the poor trolley was unsurprisingly well broken, as was RP himself as he had to push it thereafter, up all the steep hills!
Finally back at the 19th, a much welcome beer or two for the exhausted golfers, some amusing stories told, THEN Terry Mead’s dreaded fines. Highlights being:
Guest player Clive Taylor being fined for impersonating our ex-chairman Keith Taylor in more ways than just his name, then receiving a further fine for not being a member and wearing a PGS shirt, despite winning it previously!
A fine for Geoff Morris (I didn’t get the full story behind this one) for being ill and having a heart attack??…..which seemed a bit harsh I thought!
Finally, prize giving time, which was too late for Mr Brazier to get a fine for tipping all the money and cards all over the floor. The board shows that NP was Doddy, NP in 2 was AYE?? (My best guess is David Yule, cos if you offer him a pint he says “Aye”!)
Best guest was Clive Taylor who refused another shirt for a prize!
3rd Tony Poynder with a creditable 35 points
2nd place claimed by Nick Moody with a handicap equalling 36
The overall winner was, with a fluke score of (see the board on WhatsApp) 370 points….WHO???
